The Story Of “I Am Going to Be Single Forever”

Melissa couldn’t help but stare at the couple sitting across her on the train. They were kissing and cuddling, oblivious to anyone else on the train.

She had been single now for 5 years with no prospects in sight. At 28 years of age, Melissa was losing hope that she would find anyone and that she would be single forever. 

All her close girlfriends were married, with some of them being first-time mums. And whilst Melissa’s girlfriends had tried setting her up in the past, nothing had eventuated. It seemed as if they, too, had resigned to the fact that Melissa was going to be single for the rest of her life.

But the most disappointed and vocal person concerned about Melissa’s relationship status was her own mother. Melissa had avoided going to visit her mum, and when she did visit, cut her stay short because her mother always asked the same question: “Have you found a nice guy?” After answering, “No”, her mother would then offer recommendations of people she had met at church, shopping, and even suggestions from the next door neighbour.

Melissa always left her mother’s home feeling deficient in some way and believing the story that she was going to be single forever.

To all the single souls out there who choose to be single and enjoy the benefits, which are many, we applaud and congratulate you.

Being single is not something to be ashamed of, or a reflection of your self–worth. 

In fact, there are many individuals who prefer and want to be single as there are many benefits to wanting and enjoying the single life.  Being free and independent to do what you like, when and how, creates happiness for many.

However, there are times when you crave connection and want to find someone special in your life. Especially, as we as humans are hardwired for connections with other people.

But like everything in life, if you want results, you will need to take action. If you want to meet someone new, you have to be ready to go out more, perhaps going to new places, finding a hobby, or joining social groups specific to your interests. You may even consider joining some dating apps.

This week’s challenge is: If you are seeking a relationship, cast your net wider by joining a group or taking a class that interests you. You might not meet your significant other there, but you can befriend others and join their circle of friends, which could lead to finding that special person. And you will be doing or learning something that brings you joy and raises your happiness and self-confidence.

If you are unhappy about being single, consider taking action and making the changes to help you find a partner. 

But remember, don’t buy into the cultural expectations that you have to be in a relationship. Being single only has to be a negative thing if you are unhappy.

Forever creating

Deborah Ruth