The Story Of “I Feel Helpless”

Joy felt overwhelmed.

It seemed that every part of her life was falling apart, and she felt hopeless in knowing what to do.

She felt unfulfilled in her job, which she had been at for five years and knew that there were no prospects of advancing. She was constantly dealing with the question “Should I leave? Start afresh and find something that is more satisfying?” The answer was always the same: “What if I don’t find better? Is it worth the change? What if it is worse than what I have now? Better the devil you know than the one you don’t. So, Joy stayed in her job feeling unsatisfied and unhappy.

Her relationship with her partner Charlie was also going through a rough patch. He seemed so distant and emotionally withdrawn. Joy wanted to ask him why he had shut her out, but she was afraid to ask. What if he broke up with her? Would she find someone else?

Joy was scared of being on her own, and she did not want that. So, Joy reasoned that perhaps Charlie was just going through a phase, and even though she was unhappy, she should be supportive and not rock the boat.

To make matters worse, Joy had started emotionally eating. She was always feeling hungry, and every time she felt sad or depressed, which was constantly these days, she would go to the pantry and start eating. It felt like she had no will power and couldn’t stop herself. Joy felt she had no control over her eating, so she kept on eating because it was the only thing that made her feel a little bit better.

The result, however, was that her clothes now didn’t fit her, which made her feel even worse—especially as she felt so unmotivated and didn’t want to do any exercise.

Joy felt overwhelmed and hopeless.

She was living the story of “I feel helpless” and believing that she could do nothing to improve her situation.

Feeling helpless is something that many people have felt and experienced in their life from time to time. It is a difficult feeling, which makes it hard to face the challenges in your life.

Fortunately, this does not need to be a permanent feeling as there are things you can do to feel better and face life’s challenges.

One of these is to focus on what you can control in your life. For, when you can focus on what you can control, it ignites the feelings of being capable, empowering, and motivating you to take action.

So, this week’s challenge is to remember and focus on what you are good at. What are your strengths, your talents, your abilities? Focus and emphasize these by creating a list of these attributes. Think about experiences and events which recognise your abilities and strengths, and write these down. Look for evidence where you have taken action or achieved a specific goal and write these down also.

Recalling and emphasizing your capabilities and achievements is a great way to empower and motivate you to look at your challenges and to see yourself and the situation differently.

Start changing and reframing your limited story of helplessness to one of being capable.

This is one of many small steps you can take to reduce the demoralizing effects of feeling helpless. Other steps include being aware of your self talk, practicing mindfulness, being aware of your personal beliefs and stories. And if you are finding this feeling especially difficult, consider seeking professional help,which is a powerful way to empower yourself.

Forever creating
Deborah Ruth